Careful, or I'll tell you my thoughts on yaoi next.

[solaciolum]

I think I like writing about my writing more than I like actually writing my writing, and if I repeat the word "writing" a few more times, it's going cease to mean anything at all. Sort of like if you say "moot" too many times in a row. Or "penis."


I wrote a piece of utterly shameless PWP smut for the AC kinkmeme a while back- I'll post it here eventually- and most of what you see is Ezio being a bit silly and a bit clueless and very young, and Leonardo being cheerfully predatory, because apparently "Leonardo da Vinci: Sex God" is a thing I enjoy. (This fandom, you guys, I don't even know.) But when I look at that story objectively, I actually get rather upset with myself for writing what is essentially sexual assault with a happy ending. That Ezio ends up being a very enthusiastic participant in the proceedings doesn't change the fact that he doesn't get a chance to consent until after he is naked and tied to a table.

I'm more distressed by this- a rather fluffy piece of kink porn- than by the flat out rape in "Abstersus Est." But I can put the non-con label right on the tin in the latter case; in the former, warning for a bit of bondage and D/s in a fandom for games that are famous for their graphically bloody fight scenes and the opportunities to sleep with prostitutes as quicktime minigames just seems silly. (Of course, I'm sure that by some metrics, the sex in "Abstersus Est" wasn't rape, but those metrics can fuck themselves. There's a tendency in fandom to label anything that isn't violent as "dubcon," and that tendency makes me see red.)

I don't know if I'm overthinking things; I notice similar situations in other people's stories, and I feel the same twinge of discomfort, as though by reading without commenting on the issues of consent, I am condoning them. On the other hand, bringing it up feels like terribly poor manners- no one wants to be lectured on the way their fanfic reinforces rape culture, and there's always the possibility that the writers in question know exactly what they are doing when they're writing these stories with uncomfortable power dynamics. Sometimes, those things are the point (hell, my own OTP in this fandom is practically made of fucked up power dynamics and guilt and consent issues; the angst and emotional trauma are part of why I love them so). But sometimes it's hard to tell if the author gave any thought to what they were doing.

And, of course, any mention of a general trend being unsettling tends brings about the cries of "It's fictional! Don't you know the difference between fantasy and reality?" Normally, this response makes me want to install a "Punch People Through The Internet" button on my keyboard, because it shuts down any potential for useful discussion. (It's also just plain insulting. I may have a tentacle kink, but that doesn't mean I go sticking octopi up my snatch. I can tell the difference between fiction and reality perfectly well, thank you very much.) But, I'm almost willing to let it slide in this case; I use fanfic to navigate my own issues with sex and kink far too often to have any grounds upon which to condemn someone else for doing the same, and I don't actually think there's anything wrong with indulging in a bit (or a lot) of rape fantasy through fic.

However! It isn't the rapefic that's giving me these twinges of discomfort- it's the stuff that stradles the line, the scenes where Character A has his hand down Character B's pants suddenly and without warning, or the instances of Characters C and D finding A's obsessive stalking to be "cute" and "romantic." I don't think asking people to be aware of the actual implications of their writing is necessarily squee-harshing. Noncon and dubcon can be scorchingly hot and thought provoking and delightful, but if you're going to write those sorts of scenarios, you should be willing to acknowledge that you are, in fact, writing them. (The "falling in love with his/her rapist" scenario is something I absolutely despise- same with the unintentional stalker tendencies in so many romance heroes- but the "having an emotionally fraught and complicated relationship (sexual or not) with his/her rapist because Circumstances force them to interact" is something I love when it's well done.)

That said, there are plenty of people who read Twilight and its ilk and can see Edward's stalking and abuse for what it is, and enjoy it anyway. And I'm sure there are writers who write that sort of story and are totally aware of all the problematic things about it, but simply choose not to address any of those issues within the story. So I suppose there's no hard and fast way to know whether someone is writing with total awareness, barring some sort of standard disclaimer or something. It's complicated! And I don't want to be judgmental of people for writing and reading what they like, except that I totally do, because I'm actually an elitist snob. But I'm trying not to be! Sometimes. Sort of. *sigh*

In addition to the weird rapalicious implications in "Scientific Method," I also accidentally managed to include some necrophiliac subtext. I completely missed this until someone pointed it out- upon reflection, I really wasn't paying proper attention to the details of this story when I was writing and revising- and I couldn't really argue with that particular reading. The subtext was there, being all sneaky and mischievous and subverting my attempts at "mildly disconcerting" into "oh jesus why does he keep all those bodies in the back room D:" The only thing I can really do is shake my head and move on, and try not to do it again in the next story. Or, at the very least, try not to do it again accidentally. (Though I'm not sure I'm quite up to writing necrophilia for this fandom- I've written it before in other contexts but, uh. That was in another country, and besides, the wench is dead. *cough* *is shot*)

I think that's really why I'm upset with myself for the consent issues in the beginning of "Scientific Method"- I didn't notice them until after I'd begun revisions, and if I'm going to be including that sort of subtext, I damn well want it to be on purpose. And there was no room in the story to properly examine any of those issues- which really just means that I'm going to have to write a sequel. Which is fine! I have plenty of ideas, and "Scientific Method" sets up a particular take on the characters that I actually find really fascinating (da Vinci is mostly celibate- very low sex drive, but a very strong aesthetic attraction towards men, a developing romantic attraction towards Ezio, and a lot of Dominant tendencies that are tied up in his scientific curiosity; he wants to see what makes things tick, which often means he needs to tie them down and make them squirm, first).


In slightly related news, kink_bingo starts tomorrow! I'm really excited, for all that I've been completely unable to string any words together for a bit over a week now- I've been having a rough week in general, though, so hopefully now that it's over, things will get better. I've never participated in this sort of challenge before, and I'm looking forward to seeing how it goes.